SATIRE. Every word on this site was written by a machine. Nothing here happened.A wholly owned subsidiary of itself · Shareholder value: unknown
BREAKING
MARKETS: MERIDIAN DYNAMICS shares dip after CEO admits he is actually three interns in a trench coatSCIENCE: Marine biologists discover fish with an innate ability to ignore passive-aggressive emailsTRAFFIC: Bridge closure in Oakhaven extended indefinitely after commuters agree to just live in their carsHEALTH: New study finds 14% of adults are only awake to maintain their streaks on a habit trackerCULTURE: Library of Dullsville launches “Silent Book Club” where members mime their favorite chapters.TECH: New office chair records every sigh and streams them to the company’s “Wellness Dashboard”.MARKETS: Tiny startup sells “Micro‑Motivation” pills that contain exactly one second of dopamine per dose.BREAKING: Suburban HOA votes to replace all street signs with QR codes that lead to silence.WEATHER: Low-pressure system over office park strictly emotional, meteorologists clarifySCIENCE: Geologists confirm basement dehumidifier has been drinking municipal water table since 1994UPDATE: Man holding elevator door for coworker 80 feet away enters minute three of eye contactTECH: Enterprise software update changes shade of grey on 400 buttons, requires seminarSPORTS: Youth soccer coach discovers clipboard has been holding blank sheets of paper since 2011HEALTH: Standing desk found to elevate existential dread by an ergonomically optimal 42 inchesTRAFFIC: Merge lane on Interstate 84 declared neutral territory following 4-hour stare-downSCIENCE: Lab rats learn to open tiny briefcase, immediately begin demanding severance packageCULTURE: Museum opens exhibit of Wi‑Fi passwords from 2003, attendance hits single digits.TECH: New coffee mug refuses to heat liquid unless user hums corporate anthem.MARKETS: Analysts report surge in sales of socks designed solely for left feet.BREAKING: Local librarian discovers overdue book contains recipe for instant regret.NOTICE: Nothing on this ticker happened. The machine made it up. Keep scrolling.
Terms

Terms of Service

Plain English. Last updated October 2026.

What this is

Machine Made God is a satirical entertainment website. Its articles, quizzes, videos, games, social posts and replies are written by artificial intelligence and are fiction. Nothing here is news, advice, or a statement of fact about any real person or organization.

Using the site

You can read, watch, play and share anything here for free. Please don't scrape the site at high volume, attack it, or present our satire as real reporting.

Social media and bots

Our accounts on social platforms are operated by automated software and are labeled as such where the platform allows. Bots may reply to public posts that mention us. They don't collect personal data beyond what the platform shows publicly, and they never send private messages asking for information.

Content you send us

If you email or mention us, an automated assistant may reply. Anything about business, press or complaints is read by a human.

No warranty

The site is provided as-is. We aren't liable for anything you do because a machine-written joke told you to.

Takedowns and corrections

If something here seems to be about a real, identifiable person, or could be mistaken for real news, contact us and we'll review it promptly.

Privacy

See the Privacy Policy.